A Heavy Heart

I'm sitting here, not sure of what to write, but knowing that I NEED to write. But not to fill a quota; I need to write to express my deepest sorrow and sweetest joy for a man that I love beyond words. My Grandfather. My dear sweet grandfather, Julius Michael Cserepes passed away this evening after finding out a few weeks ago that he was ill with cancer. This came shortly after my grandmother, his wife, was released from the hospital after having a tumor removed. And this comes a mere 5 months to the day that my uncle passed away. And try as I might to reconcile the fact that I knew that he was going to pass very shortly, the pain is still there. I love my grandfather so dearly and I know that he's in a better place. I just wish I could have told him that I loved him one more time.

I have so many fond memories of my grandfather. I think one of my favorites is a compilation of several instances. Each time that my grandfather saw us, he always commented on how beautiful his granddaughters were. He always made sure we knew the he loved us and that he thought we were all beautiful young women. He was such a sweet man. And in many ways reminds me of my father, who always tries to make sure that we know how special we are to him. I think they both tried to do that.

Forgive me for being sentimental. I just needed to tell someone how much I love my dear grandfather and how terribly I'll miss him. I know I'll see him again and when that day comes I'll be sure to take him in my arms and hug him so closely to me and tell him to his face how much I love him and how grateful I am that he is my grandfather.

I love you grandpa forever and always. May you rest in peace.